Last Thursday, I wrote a post about how Elmo invited himself to Mazzy’s birthday party and now it seems like a Sesame Street theme is growing like a disease over my planned festivities.

In case you’re wondering, I’ve decided to embrace it.

I have also decided NOT TO BAKE MY OWN CUPCAKES, thanks to a photo a reader named Jennifer posted on the Mommy Shorts fanpage.

Behold the worst attempt at Cookie Monster cupcakes EVER:

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Nothing says “Happy Birthday!” like a dozen blue zombie lizards scaring/scarring a roomful of children.

Unfortunately, the woman who “NAILED IT” is not alone. Extensive research (one or two google searches and way too much time on Cake Wrecks) uncovered several failed birthday party cakes that have the power to make you pack up your cake pan and electric mixer for good. Even scarier, many of these cakes appear to have been for sale.

12 SPECTACULAR BIRTHDAY CAKE FAILS

1) Dora the “OMG! There are two giant walruses fighting over my hair!”

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2) Mickey Mouse turns 83 and doesn’t look a day over 97

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3) What makes an engine go on a murderous rampage?

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4) Barney gives himself a bikini wax

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5) Shrek after a year on the Subway Diet

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6) Angry Birds in bad Sesame Street disguises

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7) Who lives in a deli case until he expires? SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!!!

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8) Burn Victim Barbie

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9) Decapitated Chewbacca

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10) Incontinent Elmo

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11) What? You’ve never seen a unicorn barn before?

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12) Welcome to the rest of your life, Peter

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BONUS ROUND

I’d also like to take this opportunity to point out that cakes are sliced with a huge knife and then eaten. So try to refrain from having one of those edible photo images of your child on the top.

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Seriously, there is no easy way to slice into a baby’s head. Especially when she is staring RIGHT AT YOU.

Likewise for those oddly popular (google it) creepy sculpted baby cakes.

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Do you know what it looks like when one of those things is sliced into with a cleaver head first? I DO. And I have not slept soundly since.

I’m gonna leave you with one last cake. It’s not a birthday cake but its so FANTASTIC, I had to share.

If you ask me, the groom looks a little too excited to slice into that thing…

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Anybody got an epic baking fails to share of their own?

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Cakes found on The Chive, Cake Wrecks, The Power of MakingOddee, Fail Blog, The Laughing Stork and StyleFrizz.