Sometime in the last month, I decided the potty was not a reading station or a bath time procrastination device, but a place in which my daughter should actually pee and poop. I think it was the day she crossed her arms, stomped her foot and said…
“I want to wear diapers FOREVER!!!!”
In my mind, if you know how to emphasize the word “FOREVER” in a sentence like a pimple-faced pre-teen, than you are most definitely ready to shit on the pot.
So, this past weekend, with the fear that my daughter would INDEED be the kid who goes to college still in diapers, I forgot everything I ever said about waiting for her to tell me she was ready and forced the issue.
I put up a chart. I bought a bag of M&M’s. I let her chose a “grand prize” for when she had successfully peed in the potty 12 times. Lastly, I told her that she would not be training alone. We would be training Minnie Mouse too.
For the record, she was not on board with any of this until Minnie Mouse entered the picture.
Obviously, I’m no expert. I parent with bribes and stuffed rodents. And we were only semi-successful. But I learned a lot. Here’s your opportunity to learn from my mistakes…
12 Things I Wish Someone Had Told Me About Potty Training:
1. If you’ve read, memorized and are prepared to stick to a trusted potty training method, chances are you will abandon that method and make it up as you go along within the first fifteen minutes.
2. Just because you have a seemingly intelligent child, doesn’t mean they can follow simple instructions like— how to wipe from front to back. I gave up on the whole front to back thing once it became clear my daughter didn’t even know the difference between her “tushie” and her “pagina”.
3. Making fun of parents who would dare to use something as ridiculous as the iPotty prior to actually training a child yourself, will suddenly seem very silly once your child has convinced you to let them use the iPad on the potty.
4. Every instinct you have ever had about piss and shit will disappear. You will cheer. You will describe. You will admire. You will triumphantly walk that bowl of crap over to the toilet all together like it’s THE SHIT PARADE and this is the world’s greatest family bonding moment.
5. If you think your child has mastered potty training within half-a-day, that is the exact moment they will forget everything they’ve learned and pee inside a carseat sitting on the floor in your hallway.
6. If you are in the middle of potty training and your child decides to randomly sit inside their carseat, be suspicious. Be very, very suspicious.
7. If your child’s favorite pooping corner is also where she keeps a disassembled 50-piece jigsaw puzzle, you might want to clean it up, put it back in the box and line that spot like Dexter’s kill room.
8. Remembering to use the potty while fully naked is an entirely different skill than remembering to use the potty while wearing pants and underwear. Think algebra as compared to calculus.
9. Peeing in the potty is a totally different skill than pooping in the potty. Think earth science as compared to physics.
10. At some point there will be piss and/or shit on your carpet and you must act like this is no problem whatsoever.
11. For every M&M your child eats, be prepared to eat five yourself.
12. When you reach the end of your potty training chart and you’re cheering “YAY! My daughter is potty trained!!!”, she might start crying because she thought at the end of it, she’d get to go back to wearing diapers.
So, where are we now?
My daughter can pee in the potty when she isn’t wearing any pants.
Calculus and physics have not been mastered yet.
But… the smile on her face each time she used the potty on her own, might have made three years of diaper changes worth it.
I wish I could post a picture of her smile here. But for my daughter’s future googling protection, I will refrain.
Now, please excuse me while I clean my carpet for the 47th time.
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Hahahahahahahahaha!!!! Been there twice, I feel your pain/grossed-out-ness. As for shit on carpet, clean it with a wet wipe and then go to town with antibacterial wipes. I have no idea if the antibacterial wipes help but they make me feel better until the next time I have the carpet cleaned, which lets face it will be when I’m reasonably sure she’s done shitting on it.
And now? You get to be on high alert every. time. you. leave. the. house. as to the proximity and relative grossness of every single bathroom in the city, because when a newly potty trained kid has to go, you have 30 seconds to get her pants down on the nearest potty. And you’ll likely be holding her while she does her business, either above a gross seat or just for moral support (I *wish* I was kidding), so a good sling/carrier for the baby is a must-have.
Oh and also? You’ll still be wiping her tushie and until she’s 5. That’s a fine motor skill kids just can’t/won’t master at 2 or 3, or even 4. Get some OxiClean for when you miss a wipe, and don’t get too attached to any individual pair of undies. Potty training is definitely a marathon, not a sprint. Or maybe it’s a 4-year degree in physics and calculus. 🙂
I love this post. Here’s a site for all potty training related stuff. Methods, great books, and other tricks http://totsandkids101.blogspot.com
Lol hahahaha I can totally relate to this!!! Omg Ty for writing this…very witty and funny…and wow so spot on lol
Currently doing this – second time round – so I feel your pain. First time round, I got lucky and had a child who somehow breezed through with minimal drama or mess. The second child? Oh, she’s getting it… but like Mazzy, she thinks diapers are a much better idea. Let’s just say that, regardless of bribes (and there are plenty), diaper-free time is only happening at home because she is quite content to shit her pants. I feel like the universe is serving it up to me now because her big sis most definitely did NOT like shitting her pants, therefore making the process a million times easier.
God, I wish there was a fast-forward button for toilet training…
Have you tried the 3 day program? We had AMAZING success with this http://43e2e2vst93-a30j582n2d4pa4.hop.clickbank.net/
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Wearing pants is highly overrated anyway, right? This was hilarious, but I tried not to laugh out loud, out of respect for your frustration (and the fact that I have to do it again in the next few months). My first was tough, but he got there eventually, as will Mazzy. Either that, or she’ll get old enough to change her own diapers… She said, jinxing her own future potty training attempts.
We too are cleaning up puddles & eating jelly beans right now. Hang in there!
Try twins. LOL. Actually, it wasn’t that bad. They were both completely done within 2 months of each other.
We are in the EXACT same place with potty training. It would all be wonderful if my daughter never had to wear pants or underwear and could just go everywhere naked but somehow I think that would be inappropriate when she hits jr. high… UGH. She is 3.5 too. I thought girls were easier!!!
Not wearing underwear is too immoral! With me, I loved my dark blue stripe underwear, that I always pulled up my dark blue stripe underwear, even if I seriously wet my dark blue stripe underwear, and cried bitterly! Then, I just tried too open the fly of my dark blue stripe underwear, that I less seriously wet my dark blue stripe underwear, and cried less bitterly! I am of severe/profound mental retardation. The same for her. She, just must love her new dark blue stripe underwear, she’ll always pull up her new dark blue stripe underwear, even if she seriously wets her new dark blue stripe underwear, and cries bitterly! Then, she just must try too pull the bottom and back of her new dark blue stripe underwear too one side, that she’ll less seriously wet her new dark blue stripe underwear, and cries less bitterly!
Here’s my question about the iPotty photo: Why does it appear that Don Draper is about to use it?
Godspeed, my friend.
It took 18 agonizing months of potty training my daughter before she all of a sudden decided on her own to potty train 100% one day about a month before her 3rd birthday. It. was. awful. I’ve been much more relaxed about potty training my son and waited for him to take the lead. He’s pretty much potty training himself. One thing though…boys are SOOOOOO much messier than girls!! My little genius can pee ON the potty chair, UNDER the potty chair, and AROUND the potty chair without getting a single drop IN the potty chair.
I swore (to God, via a written prayer on my blog) that I would never share the details of our potty training adventures. And God help me, I stuck to my vow. But now that it’s done and Lil’ Bit has been fully potty-trained for four full months, I did recently share the story of how it finally came about in a post I wrote for a local parenting site. Basically, it involved me asking Lil’ Bit why she wanted to keep peeing in pull-ups when I knew she knew how to use the potty. She, in turn, looked me right in the eye and said, “Because I can.” And that’s when I was like, “Okay, then… this ends now,” and stuck her little tush in underwear. Two weeks later, she was fully trained. And I had never felt so totally relieved.
And yes, we have cheered and described and admired, just like you said. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
at least she has some interest. my son won’t even look at the potty, and apparently, has no breaking point when it comes to ludricous bribes.
I am right here with you. Lots of cheering, lots of descriptive words, and lots of spot shot. Our work is never dull and boring.
I was never more thankful for the blessing of wood floors than during the potty training years.
Well put and touché. Been there with 2 kids in less than 2 years and please now stick a form in me, because I am done!! You said it perfectly though!!
We’re at the same point with our son right now. I don’t see how it will ever work, but for some reason we decided we needed to start teaching him the ropes. He can stand and pee in the tub at will, but the moment the potty is involved he has no clue what is going on.
How did you get your son to use the potty instead of the bathtub? That’s where we are at now. He even will go up there and potty by himself but will not go in the potty. He’ll sit on it but not go. I don’t know what to do! Lol
I know every kid is going to be different, but I will share how I got my son potty trained. I knew when he was about to poop because there was suddenly silence and he would find an inconspicuous spot to “hide.” I saw him demonstrating this behavior and took his pants and diaper off and said “I know you have to poop, so go in the potty.” He held out and whined and cried for a diaper for about 2 hours before he could hold out no longer… and went in the potty. I then put him in underwear and he had a few accidents over the next week or so, but has been golden ever since. There is the occasional “I’m starting to pee in my pants!!” freak out if he holds it for too long, but that’s it. he was 3.5 when I did this, and is turning 4 in a few weeks.
I had to stop reading at “pagina” since I nearly spit out my lunch. I am SO paying attention though, since I will soon be embarking on this adventure for the third (and final, YAY!) time. I shall continue…..
Lol, awesome post. I’m going through potty training right now as well… so it was great to read about your experience… I’m going to reblog this on Chicken Nuggets and Elmo!
Shit Parade…that is classic!
every weekend for the last 3 months we have spent in “big boy pants” but the day care said they hadn’t started potty training yet…so of course by the end of each week – it was a whole new experience. He turned 3 and moved into the 3 year old class and they said “Well he has to be potty trained so bring lots of underwear and changes of clothes for him” (this was this monday….2 days ago) I did and he only had one accident monday and tuesday! Yay! Today at 10am they call me at work and tell me he’s coughing so he has had 3 accidents already. He’s not doing well potty training today and he’s on his last outfit!….I can NOT just leave work any time they call (and they call often for many dumb reasons…”he doesn’t like his raisins” okay..don’t make him eat them!) I tell them – “if he’s coughing…put a pull=up on him in his last outfit and I’ll try to get out of work at 2 but I CAN NOT come any sooner.” To which the teacher replies (in her 20’s only has one child of her own that is 6 months old) “No we dont want to un-do what he’s learned” (in 2 days?!?)”He needs to remember that it’s bad to go in his clothes”
At this point I am close to yelling and say in a very clipped tone…. “He’s in his last outfit – he’s having accidents because he has a cough – you are NOT going to make him feel bad! I can NOT get there till 2 PUT THE DAMN PULL UP ON HIM TILL I CAN GET THERE!” She mumbled under her breath and said “see you at 2” Do I really need to say just how I’ll flip out if I get there at 2 and he DOES NOT have the pull up on? probably not.
Oh the potty training FUN 🙂
I just completed training the 3rd and final child. For the previous 2 I had all the tricks: books, bribes and Netflix cued on the iPhone.
this time I didn’t care about all that stuff (i.e. ain’t nobody got time for dat!), she wanted Dora underwear so I put them on and said “Dora doesn’t want pee on her face.”
My daughter looked appropriately horrified and solemnly nodded.
2 days.
Done and Done.
Zero carpets harmed.
Thank GOD for my mother inlaw who was our babysitter at the time. She had my son trained at 18 months with no effort from me. Loved that woman
Thank you for the tips. I haven’t started yet with my 2 1/2 year. I was thinking about waiting until summer when she can wear a dress and undie only. Maybe she wouldn’t like to wet Dora’s face either like Rorybore’s… 🙂
So funny Kristin… ! I will have to check out your post =)
I started training my daughter at the beginning of last summer. She had a few pee accidents but poop just wasn’t happening. She was actually holding it in, getting constipated and then I had to give her an enema then she would repeat the whole sequence again. I finally gave up and told her Miss Levy would send her home from preschool if she had a poop accident and if it happened a couple of times she wouldn’t be allowed back She started in the fall and they say all kids have to be totally potty trained. When I dropped her off the first day I wasn’t sure how she would do. However it’s now almost 5 months later and not one accident. I think it’s because I stopped focusing on her poop accidents and started making her clean them up. Not sure if it was that or I just stopped making an issues of them anymore.
My son was another one that had issues poop potty training. When in pull-ups he wouldn’t run and hide, he would run in circles around our house. Try telling a boy who would do that while pooping, that he now had to sit down and poop. We had quite a few accidents on the playground with him till he finally figured it out. Now every afternoon (like clockwork) he goes and poops. Of course he is now 7 but once he figured it out it’s always been like that for him.
I hate potty training. I plan on celebrating in style when my last and fourth child is done with diapers.
Just make sure you don’t “accidentally” eat all the M&M’s while watching tv at night. I did that once, and boy was there a backlash.
Oh yay… I’m about to enter this relatively soon and I hear boys are far worse than girls, on average. Ugh. Thanks for posting these! Hilarious read.
I am about to embark upon this adventure….again with my girl who’s about to turn 3. She was all “check me out pooping on the potty” at about 18 months…. she’s a HORRIBLE MEAN tease!!! Cause all that shit is gone (pun intended!).
Also, I don’t know if you have Fred Meyer’s in your area (or maybe it’s Krogers where you are, whatever) but ours has a drop off play area for little kids. It’s awesome to shop without her climbing out of the cart or “sneak-shopping” when I’m not looking and she LOVES it there. Here’s the catch. They have one of those Little Tikes/step2 big plastic play houses in there. And she loves it…. that’s her poop den! We usually are in and out of that store in 15 minutes or so. When we come pick her up she’s always in the house. She sees us and slams the shutters closed. Then comes out… all hot and steamy with stink! If I could fit one of those over my toilet, I’m pretty sure potty training would be a non-issue…. but I’d have to devise some sort of pop up poop den for travel purposes…. hmmmmm, I’m gonna be a millionaire!
I am so impressed you can limit yourself to only 5 M&Ms each time.
I have a 30 year old picture of my 2 year old daughter squatting next to her brand new baby brother. Pantless. And in the background is her potty chair, full of pee. I never noticed any of it, I was so focused on how cute they were together. LOL I kept the potty chair in the living room so she could run and sit on it anytime she wanted. She trained herself when I took off the diapers, pee running down her bare legs was icky lol. And yeah. Lots of carpet cleaning and paying attention to the “poopy” look coming over her face. But I was NOT changing two sets of diapers, thank you very much. Fortunately, she cooperated.
My son, however, took forever and I didn’t think we were ever going to make it. He was nearly four before being night trained and daytimes were hit and miss for a long time. He could do it, just wouldn’t. She was barely two when she was successful. Sadly, that was a telltale sign of the stubborness and defiance that my boy showered me with his whole growing up time. Love him dearly, but omg.
Yay Mazzy! You can do it!! You, too, Mom! Keep on cheering and clapping. Sometimes we still cheer and clap around here when someone goes potty. 😀
OMG we are in the middle of potty training now and I shook my head yes to every single thing you wrote. Oh except I have a very stubborn, hard-headed boy who yells “weave me alone!” every time he enters the bathroom! I told him I have to see him go in order to get the candy!
I don’t know if this is helpful but my friend has invented the diaper fairy. when you reach a certian age the diaper fairy comes to your house and takes all the diapers and leaves presents. then if her kids ask for diapers she says sorry! The dialer fairy took them to give to babies, you’re a big kid, yoget toys!
if it makes you feel any better, I just made friends with a lady from the Disneyland hotels housekeepingstaff because my son puked in his bed. I’m stuck here with a flu victim and my phone is dead so I have to use my husband’s hateful droid that doesn’t even have instagram.!
You seriously need to keep the m&ms for yourself and check out “ohcrappottytraining.com”. I trained my son in a week following the program. And no, I don’t know the author and am not promoting her out of anything other than admiration. Check it out, and good luck!
Potty training really has to be one of the worst parts of parenting. Though I do have to say my second was much easier as she wanted to be like her big brother– so there is hope that after you survive this the next time it will be easier 🙂
Pee in the carseat, that’s a first I’ve heard! So is she in Pull Ups or underwear? I’m struggling whether or not to get the chart up and just start with my 2.5 yr old. LOL on the sh*t parade. Guess I won’t understand until I start the process
I’ve potty trained four children and now am helping potty train my grandson. It is easier and less of a near-death-experience than teaching them to drive…more like screaming yourself silly while breaking your fingernails into the arm rest. But it is still difficult and you make it easier with your humor.
Hilarious…this will be our 3rd child we have the joys of potty training. I am not looking forward to the mess of it all or the sheer frustration of scrubbing stains from the carpet but another one without a diaper in our house is a wonderful thing.
Bwahahaha….hysterical, I know because I’m there myself. Went from my monster shitting in the middle of my living room floor, to shifting his pants to FINALLY pooping in the actual toilet…sheesh, it’s harder than house training a dog…lots of patience needed and creativity for sure but it’s awesome once it’s over. I’m pretty much done-2 weeks and he holds it until we get to the potty… AWESOME POST-LOVED IT
Dealing w some regression now w my 2 y.o. and wondering if anyone has pointers. she showed big interest in training and we started officially on Jan 1. Things were going great till these past few weeks. We ask if she has to go and she says “no”‘ but then proceeds to have an accident just minutes later. When we try to sit her on the potty, she’ll pike-out and get all rigid and insist that she doesn’t have to go…and, again, will have accidents. She pees in her high chair, on the furniture… Terrible. She does great w pooping and always tells us when she has to poop. It is pee that is the tough part. We have gotten her tested for UTI, just to rule that out.
any ideas? We did sticker chart, but she seems over that. She will even go for several days and be dry, but then have a few really bad days in a row. HElp!
Usually not a good idea to give kids FOOD as rewards if you want them to have a healthy relationship with food and healthy eating habits. I’d have gone with inexpensive toys as prizes but never food, and I don’t care if she wears diapers until college.
As a trained public health educator and professional, I have yet to read a definitive study that links a couple m&ms during potty training to chronic disease development across the lifecourse. C’mon now.
This post was an appropriate read tonight. My fully trained 4 year old didn’t go to the bathroom all day. We had a bunch of people over and I was busy and forgot to remind her to go. She was sitting in my spot on the couch, farted and said, “I think I peed.” I think? Good grief! I have two cushions covered with baking soda in hopes it won’t smell forever. On the up side, her little sister, who is 2.5 did sit on the potty when I bribed her with a cookie. Nothing happened, but she farted. As she flushed she said, “Bye, bye, thanks for coming!” to the bowl.
My almost 3 year old wont use the potty if she has pants on…its been almost 8 months since she started using the potty and she runs around with nothing on or no pants on..and its making it hard when people come over i have to put a pull up on her since they dont need to see her with nothing on..how can i get her to use the potty and wear cloths..Pls Help!!!
Potty training a child is a process of trial and error. It is both exciting and frustrating. Be sure , in the end your child will be potty trained. There are only a very few teenagers which are running around in diapers!
Cayla
This is the funniest thing I’ve yet to read over potty training. Its so stressful, and I read this and it just made me laugh and lighten up. Thankyou!
You have really made me giggle with this post. Your tips are fantastic. The overall outcome is don’t have high hopes for the state of your flooring whilst toilet training.
No matter how hard you try or how many guides you read – accidents will happen. Period.
Patience, consistency, and compassion are the keys to a successful potty training experience…
I think this was the funniest and most relatable thing I’ve ever read on potty training on the entire Internet. I’m in potty training hell right now so THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!
You put it so well when you say in #8 that potty training w/ clothes & without is algebra vs calculus. For those who want to go right to calculus, here’s some help for dressing little ones during potty training:
http://hintmama.com/2014/02/28/todays-hint-how-to-dress-your-toddler-for-potty-training-success/
awesome and very insightful read. It’s nice to know i am not alone on this. My 2 1/2 toddler girl is very observant and surprisingly caught on to the whole potty training relatively fast. She was “potty trained” in less than 2 weeks. And then about a month later….she saw the dog have an accident in the house…and now she has been peeing all over the carpet because she saw the dog doing it and i wasn’t upset at the dog because after all it was an accident and she gave me plenty warning before she actually relieved herself inside…i was just too busy to stop and take her out on time. So i suppose now my daughter thinks she can just pee on the floor without any consequence…even though the dog hasn’t had any more accidents….and now for some reason she has been going on the bed for the sole purpose of sitting on it and peeing on it!…i have the room locked up for now…i just don’t understand all this doing…part of me thinks it’s just a phase and i just need to ride it out but i just hope it goes fast! at least i cannot complain about going on the floor in other places, everywhere else she is ok, but in our house she wants to be naked and refuses to wear any clothes and acts out with the peeing issues i just described….I think i will need to start briving her with candy 🙁
Thank you so much for the giggle. My daughter is 3 years 8 months and still hasn’t gotten it. I was scouring the internet for some advice that I hadn’t already read, or that wasn’t completely unrealistic, and came across this. A little comic relief certainly helps.
Having trouble potty training? Questioning on how fast it can be done? Do you use pull ups or not?? Find out helpful ways to potty train your little one.
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I started training my daughter when she was 13 mos. Old she did good for the first 2 days but it did not last. So i just let it go and waited till she turned 2. It was hard like you i also used stuffed animals and dolls and even watched youtube potty videos to make her go but it wasn’t a success. so i thought of stickers…. i went bought different cartoon character stickers and smiley face. I made a chart and everytime she pee and poop in the potty she gets a sticker and every time the one row of chart gets full of stickers she gets 5 pieces of m&m lol.. wallla … it worked… after 1 week of rewarding her stickers after she goes potty. I reduced giving her stickers and chocolates so she wont also get used to getting a reward when she does something good. Even though she is still a little child but its good to also train them not to expect something in return if she do good and to others. So now she is 2 1/2 years old she goes to potty all the time and she gets up from bed dry. Sometimes o even forget to put pull ups on her when we go somewhere but luckily she was dry lol… she tells me she has to go potty too either we are home or out in public.. so i say try the stickers and alot of praises. Kids has different personalities so just keep trying. Goodluck!!!
Toilet training is a pain in the butt! There are so many new tools and devices these days but I don’t think they really work anyway, when your kid is ready he is ready. iPotty? Really? Carly 🙂
Thank god for honest mummies like you! I am potty training my 2yr 9 month year old boy and it’s proving to be a long process. My own mum has been chasing him with a potty since he turned 2 and I actually think it has had such a negative effect. He wasn’t interested for such a long time. Too much pressure n ended up constipated ! Mum though just cause my 3 sisters and I trained when we turned 2 that he should too, but boys are definitely different. I have a very stubborn child (a bit spoilt too -was only grandchild on Both sides, was bound to happen)! Week one was quite good. Lots of successes in the potty and he loved the attention. Nappies only on at bed time. Pants and mostly bare bum for the best part of the day. Week 2, total nosedive! Really disinterested, hates the potty and will now only pee in the toilet. Still peeling all over the place! Won’t go to toilet off his own signal, successes are only because he is being scooped up every half hour or so to the nearest bathroom! Week 3 – he still hasn’t had one poo on the potty, still choosing to poo in his pants in a private area like behind the sofa. Used potty occasionally but pee’s mainly in the toilet but only if he is in the mood, lots of distraction needed. Still won’t alert me when he needs to go. I keep hearing friends and other mummies saying their child was trained in 4 days to a week at much younger ages. I’m off on maternity (5 month old girl) and go back to work in a few weeks, I’ve decided to keep going until the end of summer and hope that something just clicks. He starts a playgroup in a few weeks so I’m hoping that will help. Has anyone experienced the same? Dies it just happen? I have bribed him with everything and it has helped occasionally. He will be going back to his granny for childminding while I am at work and I really don’t think she’ll have the sane patience as me. Any comments would be great! Hoping to look back on this in few months with him fully trained (well during the day at least) dunno if I’m doing the right thing or actually harming my son!
Found a website that has a method for both boys and girls. Worked really well for my twins! http://www.TrainMePotty.com
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Lol! A beautiful write-up! This will surely help a lot of moms out there!
this post is sooo funny, I too am trying to potty train my 2 year old daughter who mind you has no problem running around in a dirty diaper, dirty panties, or even just going down her leg when she is naked. she is known for telling us she has too pee pee or poo poo only after she has gone in her pants, but still wants on the toilet, we bribbed her, treated her to gifts when she did go, had “talks with her” etc i some times feel she may not be ready yet and honestly, it tiring having to clean my carpets all the time lol
Soooo funny! Thanks for this article! It made me feel ‘not alone’. It’s definitely NOT as easy as some say it is! It takes a LOT of patience!
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[…] 1. If you’ve read, memorized and are prepared to stick to a trusted potty training method, chances are you will abandon that method and make it up as you go along within the first fifteen minutes……. to read more Click Here […]
There is a device which I wish was around when I was potty training. Pee-Tect Disposable Car Seat Protectors! Genius! Its an absorbent pad that protects the car seat from potty training accidents while your kid is in the car seat. I’ve had to rip apart my childs car seat and wash it, no one told me not to put it in the dryer and it shrunk. If I had the disposable car seat protector all I would’ve had to do it throw it in the garbage and place a new one down. No mess and no taking apart the seat!!! http://www.pee-tect.com
This is by far the best article I have read on the internet! Thank you fir being so open and honest! I had to potty train twins! One completed it right before her third birthday and the other was a month later. It was such a dramatic, traumatizing experience for our household!! I’m so sick of the parent shaming on the internet , it’s not like we as parents don’t try! The preschool policy is even more nerve wrecking especially when the consider my potty training not potty training because my girls need help wiping and are clutzy getting dressed again when finished. These schools don’t realize how gross it is to have a 3 year old alone in a bathroom! I’m trying to master the calculus like you said but oh boy, it’s been really hard! Thanks for sharing your story and for being so honest!
I am there right now, it’s terrible!
By the way, point 4 almost made me fall from the chair. So true. So, so true. I would add that it’s priceless when you happen to put the shit parade on scene in front of some childless relative. Their faces can really send you back to reality :D.
Hey loved your article. I have just started this marathon! She just realllly good in the daycare. But pees everyday at home. I got really angry. I think I need a lot of patience ! Let it go, I guess?!
[…] https://www.mommyshorts.com/2013/01/10-things-i-didnt-know-about-potty-training.html […]
Over 50,000 Parents Have Watched This Video And Potty Trained Their Child In 3 Days – http://bit.ly/pottytarin3days
[…] few weeks ago I talked about the process of potty training my daughter. (FYI- don’t ever put the potty training stickers in a place where your child can reach them, […]
What is 3 Days Potty Training?
Kids must reach a particular level of neurologic and emotional maturity, before they can go to toilet by themselves. Girls can achieve toilet training a couple of months earlier than boys. So, forcing is not the right thing to do before these ages. Around the age of 2, children are more likely to say “no”, frequently uses the word “mine”, and want to do the things without others approval in an insistent way.
They can interpret suggestions of their parents as an intervention against their life, independency, and body. Toilet training can be started as paying regard to such psychological traits, around the age of 2 and 2,5.
Toilet training must not coincide with some certain events like; the birth of the sibling, sickness times, any disunity situation within the family. In a nutshell, just make sure the training is not happening in a new situation or a situation requires an adaptation.
How toilet training should be handled?
As the right time decided, the talks should be made with the kid. The topic of these talks can be about how adults do their toilet, or any relevant thing such as telling them it is good to stay dry. Kids can be promoted to use the potty or the toilet at the times they refuse to get their nappies changed. Characters from stories, and how they use the toilet can be told.
When it is noticed that the child is keen about the subject matter, the children may be accompanied to get his/her potty. The potty can be stored in the kid’s room, then can be taken to the bathroom later. You can tell how it is used, but not in a forcing way. You can also make the child realize the other kids using the toilet.
3 times every day 5-10 minutes should do it. Due to the gastro colic reflexes, 20 or 30 minutes after the meals would be the right timing. The child must be awarded after the successful trials, and this should be actualized over and over again with patience. Even if they only sit for a couple of minutes, it’s also good to give them credit though the trials are not that successful. You can help and show them to throw the nappy stool into the toilet.
Eventually, the child will be awarded when the defecation is actualized in the proper place. You can clap or small gifts can be given. On the other hand; punishment or causing embarrassment should not be made if the child refuses to use the potty, or scares to use, or experiences small accidents. Especially summer months are the perfect times, when it’s not necessary for the child to wear a nappy. During these such periods, it’s pretty crucial to remind parents that they have to concentrate on the issue without feeling stressed, focus on the child’s emotions, and try to behave more flexible since all kids are different.
Some difficulties might be experienced during the toilet training. The child may completely refuse to do it, shows no interest, sits for some time without doing the defecation and does it as soon as wears a nappy, tells you that it hurts, may reject doing it after several successful trials, sometimes holds the poo in for several days and eventually experiences constipation.
During the training the relationships may get damaged; if any sort of obstinacy comes forward, It’d be the right choice to wait for the right time until the child feels ready; and without causing any envious feelings, making him to realize how the peers have achieved the toilet training. To parents: Just kick back and relax, take a deep breath, never feel upset, and frustrated. After all, there is no one that has not achieved toilet training so far, just try again at a later time, try to know your child better and simply show your love even though he or she fails during this timeline. If constipation becomes a major problem, diet advices can be received and supplements can be used.
How to know if your child is ready for potty training?
• If it’s not the time your child opposing you,
• If your child can understand words such as Wee, Poo, Wet, or make you understand at least using his/her body language,
• If your child doesn’t have bowel problems like constipation or diarrhea
• If your child feels uncomfortable when wears a dirty nappy,
• If your child can remain dry for a couple of hours,
• If your child can keep her/his nappy dry after having a nap
• If your child lets you know if she/he needs to go to the toilet,
• If your child is taking a special position or
• If your child is trying to make the parents happy,
• If your child shows the desire to become an adult,
• If your child pays attention for being clean and tidy,
• If your child can take advices and actualizes them,
• If your child can get dressed and takes off his/her clothes by himself/herself,
• If your child is keen about observing you in the toilet,
• If your child has the social consciousness about making defecation and urinating into the toilet,
Your child is ready for the toilet training.
3 Days Potty Training program for…
http://www.pottytrainingstarting.com
I have three children, all of whom had different potty training experiences. My eldest potty trained fully by 3 1/2 which felt like an eternity but later turned out to be a dream because my middle child took a very long time to train for No. 2. He was pee trained by 3. But the poop was another story. No matter what incentives we used, my son was just not comfortable popping on the potty. We tried m & ms, his favorite Star Wars toys, the incentive of getting to swim in the big kid pool, the incentive that his younger sister was about to be potty trained. We tried not offering the pull up but it was unproductive. He would just withhold which made me more nervous than him not being potty trained fully. He is also a child who had been constipated twice and required a glycerin suppository. I was actually so happy that he pooped so well and easily in his pull up that I was loathe to mess with that and have him become constipated. I had also heard frightening stories from parents and pediatricians about chronic constipation. My very enlightened pediatrician advised me to relax on the issue, offer miralax, and work towards a “magic pull up” with the hole cut out in the middle. At four years old I tried that and it did not work. I could see he desperately wanted it to work but he was scared. Another year of flaxseed smoothies, miralax at times, and other healthy high fiber offerings, he finally at age 5 and 1/4 pooped on the toilet. Over the course of the year his progression was this: he pooped in the bathroom with a pull-up AND his pants on. Finally got him to take off his pants. Then got him to sit on the toilet with a cushy ring and his pants off. Ripped the pull up off right over the toilet so he wasn’t being changed like a baby and he actually wiped himself with me assisting at end. Then finally cut a tiny hole in a pull up. Gradually made it larger and larger. Finally the hole was so large it was almost ridiculous. I very casually mentioned it was silly and he should just go without the magic pull up. And one day, despite all my fears to the contrary, he did! My sensitive, smart, kind little boy – who was not engaged in a power struggle with me- finally of his own volition and gentle prodding- turned the corner and we never looked back. It was literally the tiniest baby steps all the way till the end. My heart goes out to all the parents and little ones out there who go through this hurdle. There is an unnecessary and undue amount of shame and stress endured by all parties. Anyone who imposes this ridicule clearly is a hypocrite. Because almost every child has some area which requires extra patience, empathy, and work. Good luck to anyone who is going through this. You will get there!!
startpotty123.blogspot.com
Omg I’m in tears sitting here decompressing after a hellish day 1 of the “3 day method”. Thanks for writing this out. It’s a pleasure to read that we ( people who train) all deal with similar issues.
My little man is 20 months and ready by all accounts of the readiness assessments. Yet he REFUSES to go on the potty. Waits till he’s holding himself n doubled over until he pees on the floor( we pulled up all the rugs and he’s naked.. Sometimes in underwear, Cars ones no less,) screaming n crying “diapy, diapy”. He just won’t go pee. Can’t force a prostrate child onto a potty no matter how may gummy bears u offer him. That said we persevere tomorrow. It’s also great fun with a three year old ” little mom” helping to train!
Thanks again! ROFL. Wiping my mascara off my face!!
Blessings to all who endeavour to train their amazing little ones.
Hugs,
V
[…] is not to say we didn’t try and fail many times. It just worked when we finally backed off and took away the pressure for a few months. Once […]
Im a mom and a grandmother, and here is my dilemma; I worked hard at training my own children, and always took care that they were clean and did not have accidents in other peoples houses. For the last few years, my grandchildren have been undergoing several different methods of potty training. The two oldest still have several accidents a day and I would definitely not call them trained. they go around in soggy underwear most of the time, and soak my furniture and carpets. Their parents just laugh it off and refuse to respect my house though I have asked them to keep pullups on them in my house until they are consistently dry in the daytime., but they say it would set their training back. You would think I was asking them to put vodka in their sippy cups, for crying out loud.
There is a third baby in diapers, and another on the way. My house is their litter box. Since when was potty training an excuse to crap on everyone else? Suggestions? I am too old and tired for this.
When it came time to potty train my son, I waited for him to tell me when he was ready. And he wasn’t ready to take his “pee-peeing” by storm until he turned 3. I trained him using the 3-Day Potty Training Method.
Watch the video click here: http://tinyurl.com/trainingpotty1
If you’re a working mom, like me, I suggest you take off Friday and bang this out in a long weekend. Why? Because you need to quarantine yourselves in your home—or in my case (cringe) small apartment—for three entire days, no exceptions.
[…] as found at https://www.mommyshorts.com […]
I think it boils down to one thing. The mindset of the mother. If you can see your child going for potty and doing it him/herself that could be a great support with other steps listed above
You can download a free ebook here>>http://startpottytrainings.getresponsepages.com/
When I needed help with potty training I’ve searched the internet and I’ve found “How to make your child love going potty” by Susan Urban. It helped my with my older daughter and I thought we’ll never get rid of diapers. I am definitely going to follow the guide again with my little boy.
The guide is short so I’ve read it in like no time at all. The author seems to know what she is doing and her method is easy and my daughter loved it.
So I wanted to encourage everybody who is interested in potty train a kid to first of all try Susan Urban’s method and follow her instructions and I bet any other method won’t be necessary. I’ve found instructions on what to do and how to do it in the guide from I think the author’s website http://www.parental-love.com
I’ve heard before that Susan Urban’s guide is very good so I decided to get it and after reading it I am determinate to get rid of diapers 🙂
the guide is great! helped us a lot! thanks for sharing
Hi there,I read your blog named “12 Things I Wish Someone Had Told Me About Potty Training – Mommy Shorts” daily.Your story-telling style is awesome, keep it up! And you can look our website about powerful love spells.
“How to make your child love going potty” by Susan Urban is actually really good! Big recommendation – helpem me a lot with my daughter 🙂
…What’s wrong with having the kid who goes to college still in diapers? I was fully potty trained as a child, and when I turned sixteen I decided it wasn’t for me- by my own volition, I switched to adult nappies. I start college in about two weeks- what’s wrong with it if it’s what makes someone comfortable? Doesn’t hurt anyone else, after all!
After we had our son,i wasnt able to have any more babies due to complications.The son was fairly easy to potty train as he wanted to be like daddy and pee standing up! When he was 15,we adopted a 14 year old girl from and orphange and she was in diapers 24/7 due to her wetting issues.After we got her,we switched her from the disposable diapers to cloth pin on diapers and rubberpants.After having her fully checked out by a couple of doctors,they found there was nothing wrong with her and that she was wetting as she pleased and for convience and even at night she would feel the urge to go,but would wet in the diapers any way!After a couple of months,we had a talk with her and told her that its not normal for her to be wetting and that she needed to start using the toilet.She told us that it was a habit that she had got used to when she was in the orphange.We got her several pairs of teen size cotton training pants and had her start wearing them with the rubberpants over them and that when she had to pee,she was to let me know and i would assist her.So she finially started using the potty and quit wetting at night.We kept the cloth diapers,rubberpants and traing pants for a while more just in case.
[…] potty-training tips. I have tried numerous attempts, with no luck. I did, however, come across this hilarious blog that made me feel better about my potty training journey. It is written by a mommy named Ilana […]
I’ve tried what feels like everything and then my neighbor who is going through the same potty hell, told me to try this, http://bit.ly/2DZ3njB. OMG all I can say is where was this 3 months ago! I am so relieved.
Children who are included in the category of healthy children, their potty training toilet age come in between 2 years till they are three years old.
http://www.momenvyblog.com/potty-training-chart-guide/
this really helped my boy quick https://bit.ly/2Hixc16
So funny and so true. We love our SHIT PARADE in our house 😉 I really wish someone warned me about regressing. That is the worst and make you feel like all you accomplished is out the window. A lot of people are having success with 3 day methods like the one here https://bit.ly/2HVqoGY
wow! i love all these suggestions but what do you do if your child was diagnosed with autism and doesn’t speak just yet? I have a two year old, so far this method seem to help the most https://bit.ly/2r99Gvy so for mom’s with autistic children or if there’s a speech delay you can try this method. I think this post is more geared to if your child can communicate without problems. I’m not too grossed out about the mess as much as i am worried about my child not being to communicate to me. The three day potty training method worked wonders for me and i highly recommend it.
With 3 kids I have tried everything when it comes to potty training! Then sister showed me this https://bit.ly/2H8LeR4 best thing ever! absolute life saver!
Thank you for the great information. I took away a few tips. I am a nanny and I am currently helping Mom train her little one. We both read this book and it had some great tips too. https://bit.ly/2C21ENJ So far little one is doing good. Of course it is a process but they are growing up and that is part of life. Great post. I will share with their Mom too!
This is a pretty funny post, and I can relate to some of it with my 16 month old (we started at 9 months). Except the poop part. Since 11 months, I have rarely cleaned up floor poop, and only about 20 poop misses overall. She really prefers potty for poop and I have read that repeatedly with EC babies. For any parent reading this comment, I highly recommend pottying your baby when he/she makes the poop face way before 18 months, which is the time that they will be fully aware that poop is “supposed” to go in their diaper, and it will be harder to unteach. Do whatever you want with pees, but I would definitely recommend Elimination Communication for the poops. Cheers.
This is all great advice! If I may I’d also add to try out http://www.Sorbables.com We offer disposable fitted sheets for crib and toddler sized mattresses. Perfect for potty training or the stomach flu.
Great Stuff
This! Oh my gosh, this is the single most entertaining article on potty training I have read to date. But it’s also astonishingly useful. Potty training my daughter was a piece of cake. But my son is proving to be a colossal challenge in that arena. This article provided useful tips, a reminder that there is NO such thing as perfect potty training, and too many laughs to count in all the areas I needed them most this morning.
Thank you very much to the author and please keep ’em coming!