Once upon a time, I published my posts around midnight so they were up for you all to read in the morning. That has all changed thanks to the little hellion photographed above.

That's Harlow, in case you weren't sure.

Harlow is not the biggest fan of sleep. She prefers to stay up until at least 10pm and by the time she finally stops jumping around her crib like she's at an Insane Clown Posse concert, I'm so exhausted, I can barely haul myself to my own bed.

Yesterday, at 10pm, Harlow was holding on to the side of the crib and doing squats at 200 beats per minute like she was Jane Fonda on crack. She stands, she sits, she squats, she crawls, she does just about anything except lie down. Mazzy, for the most part, just sits on the edge of her bed watching like she's at a one-baby-show put on especially for her. 

In other words, neither of them are getting much sleep.

I don't want to talk too much about this because my plan is to address Harlow's sleep issues next week with our old friend Erin, the sleep consultant

Although, now that I think about it, we are planning to go away for the 4th, so it's probably best to start sleep training when I get back. First, we put it off because Mazzy got sick, then we put it off because Harlow got sick and now we can't do it because we are going away. BLERG.

Guess we'll all be sleepless for at least another week and you can look forward to my increasingly random posting schedule. FYI- I've still been posting every weekday, just not at any consistent time. Maybe this bothers nobody but me…

Anyway, what else happened these last few weeks besides Mike and I selling tickets to the "Sleepless Baby" midnight show?

• Mazzy told some really horrible jokes

• I was mortified when a stranger saw my nipples

• January Jones ate her own placenta

• Harlow crossed off all her milestones at once

• Poppy wouldn't stop talking about Waldbaums

• I gave you all a peek into the life of Mr. Mommy Shorts

• We all nodded in agreement at Murphy's Laws of Parenting

Harlow morphed into a banana!

• The Epic Baby Hair Contest took an unexpected turn toward the SCANDALOUS

• I coined the term "Peeps-Chic"

Annette Funicello's mom spoke out

• Grammy revealed her MASTER PLAN

and finally, my favorite…

Kids tweeted about TV shows like adults

In case you are not a member of my facebook page, I thought it was important you know what you are missing.

Namely this:


Posted by a friend of mine with the caption "Have I done this correctly?" To which, I say— "If you throw a wig on it, we'll talk".

Have a great weekend!

— Mommy Shorts