Trick or treating with a toddler can be tricky business, mainly because toddlers have no idea what the hell is going on. “Why is everybody dressed up in weird outfits?” “Why does everything taste so delicious?” “Why can’t I shove everything into my mouth at once?”
If it’s your first time taking a toddler door to door begging for candy, here are ten things you need to know.
1) Toddlers like to get candy and eat it on the spot. “Waiting till later” is a concept they will understand shortly after the Theory of Relativity.
2) Your toddler is probably too busy grabbing lollipops to notice that the best stuff lurks inside the gold Butterfinger foil and the orange Kit Kat wrapper. Sometimes you have to quit worrying “what the adults think” and reach your hand into the candy bowl to grab a Twix for YOURSELF.
3) If you are trick or treating with more than one todder, “Who Rings The Doorbell” is an integral and competitive part of the process. Be prepared to divert, distract and enforce the fine art of “taking turns”.
4) One out of every ten toddlers will go as “Child Of A Mom Who Didn’t Love Me Enough To Ignore My Massive Tantrum And Forced Me To Wear My Dinosaur Costume Anyway”.
5) The city beats the suburbs in many ways but trick or treating in an apartment building just feels WRONG WRONG WRONG.
6) Toddlers are an excellent way to check out your neighbors’ homes, since they are used to running through a door when it is opened for them. Make a huge show of calling your child back, knowing full well he/she won’t listen, and then act “embarrassed” and “apologetic” when you have to run inside to retrieve them. (So THAT’S what an eat-in kitchen looks like! Is that a Viking stove??)
7) There is no gentle way to yank a lollipop from a toddler’s hand.
8) A toddler’s first experience with candy can be a little disgusting. You must embrace the stickiness. Try not to gag when your kid reaches her chocolate saliva covered hand into someone else’s candy bowl. Or when you have to pull a lollipop out of your child’s hair while she continues to eat it. It’s confusing to have a Tootsie Roll stuck in your teeth for the first time. This understanding will help you when you have to reach your finger into the mouth of your tantruming two-year-old to dislodge that tootsie roll from his teeth.
9) Do not dress your child up as Elmo unless they are comfortable with the attention that comes from pop idol status. Note: Mazzy would like to apologize to the baby at the Children’s Library Halloween party. What must have seemed like a relentless attack was merely a prolonged show of affection.
9a) Dressing up a child as Elmo may seem like a great idea, but be prepared to explain the Elmo carcass in the days following. (Thank you to Farrah from The Three Under for submitting the picture below.)
10) Once your child knows about candy, there is no going back. I recommend letting them eat as much as they want on the night of Halloween and then telling them they won’t be getting any candy after that. Trying to get a toddler to understand a slow rationing over several weeks will break even the strongest parent. Plus, this way, you can hide the leftovers and eat them all yourself.
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How cute is Mazzy???
The Elmo carcass is just traumatizing.
I had considered dressing my 2 year old as Elmo, but after seeing that Elmo carcass I’m really glad I went with a bee instead. She almost attacked a little boy who was innocently carrying an Elmo bag.
I’m right there with you this year. There is no turning back once a toddler knows about candy.
Hilarious.
So I agree!!
And I was ruthless and grabbed a kit kat or two for me, i was dressed in costume after all!!
She woke up this morning, ran straight to her empty pumpkin basket and screamed “Where is the candy???” (I hid everything last night.) Then somehow she produced a mini-box of milk duds and demanded that I open it. “Candy isn’t for breakfast, Mazzy.” “But I want candy!!!!” “I know, Mazzy, so do I.”
The only reason I didn’t grab any kit kats is because that was our chosen candy that we gave out at our place. Made sure to stash a handful for later, of course.
I considered putting Mazzy into an Elmo costume as well since it would probably MAKE her 22mo life. Then decided I didn’t want to deal with a daily struggle to get her to wear anything else but the costume.
My kids COUNTED their candy! Now I’m not sure how I’m going to steal any!
Excellent tips (and warnings). I always think that trick-or-treating in an apartment building would be fun. Not so many stoops, no need for coats, no slush to clean up and fall into (2011!).
But I have to admit, it’s kind of fun to see how people decorated their front porches and walkways. We even had a dead mannequin in one entryway. No treats there, just a trick. The toddlers thought it was funny.
Our 15-month-old doesn’t know what candy is yet, and I am trying to delay it as long as possible. Someone told me that in their family they have a tradition where some witch or other mythical creature takes their candy while they sleep and leaves a toothbrush and a toy instead, so that their teeth don’t rot. Apparently her kids are ok with it!
Unworn dinosaur costume in a 2T, anybody? *sigh*
trick or treating in apartment buildings is depressing. The best, most efficient and most fun way to trick or treat in manhattan is taking to the streets. EVERY business has candy. Think about it: no elevators, no doorbells, just kids going to door-to-door getting handfuls of candy from people who didn’t buy it and are trying to get rid of it. And mine is at the age where i just have to open the door, look through the window and wait for them to come back and report how many twix he got. It’s also safer (I think businesses are less likely to taint candy than creepy shut ins) and more fun as you get to see other people in costume and people get to ooh and aww at your cute kid. next year, do it. HINT: Nail salons love them some Halloween.
I’ve never given Vivian candy and can count on one hand how many cookies she’s had in her life. Yet when we went to the store to buy cookies for her school’s Halloween party, she was shrieking, “Cookie! Cookie! Cooook-eeeeeee!” Same deal last night with the candy.
Are they just born with the inherent knowledge that candy is good?
Make that two of them! *sigh*
I am the meanest mom EVER and haven’t let her eat any of the candy…she was playing with a lollipop this morning saying “balloon” and I assured her that yes it was a balloon!
She’s killer cute, as usual. And the joy of candy is written, literally, all over her face.
I think another good rule is steal the good stuff for yourself ASAP. Just stick a hand in the bag while you’re out begging and slide that full size Snickers right where it belongs—your jacket pocket.
Smiles.
Laughter through tears.
Sweet nostalgic twinges.
Better than Steel Magnolias.
Thanks, for the trip down memory lane.
You, are living in heaven right now.
Oh my word she is adorable and it looks like she had a great time. ToTing in an apartment building sound brilliant to me!!
I was dangerously close to having the #3 toddler, until I forced my kid into her dragon costume and shoved a Twix into her 2-year-old mouth. Because all’s well that ends with a Twix. Amiright?
Oh my goodness, when did her hair get so long?
I think next year we should trade and you can come trick or treat in our ‘hood. I kinda like the idea of riding the elevator and staying warm. 🙂
one of the things i learned: the number 666 will appear on my 2.5 year old son’s forehead after 3 pieces of candy, and all hell will break loose. so much so, that trick or treating around the neighborhood was cancelled (went to a university outing that had candy before), and mommy had to have a much needed time out while said 2.5 year old cried in his room.
I had the Dino Tantrum kid.
::hangs head::
Oh, the stickiness! It grosses me out.
Rebecca was strangely more interested in emptying/refilling/sorting her candy than eating it… In the morning she demanded the bucket, proceeded to dump it on the floor, and got upset that a piece rolled under the couch…
I’m not sure I should even encourage it… Ignorance is bliss, right? That’s probably why she takes one bite of a french fry and hands it back to me!
At 18 mo, EB got her first piece of candy yesterday. She had a fever and it was the onlyonlyonly piece of food she would eat that day…and immediately climbed on top of the coffee table. She’s feeling better today and during breakfast she saw the candy bowl, put down her fork to point, and said Eat! Eat! She remembered. Oh, yes she did.
Love your pics! Looks like y’all had tons of fun.
This is so funny! My two older boys are not toddlers anymore. They are 8 and 5, and they STILL fight over who gets to ring that damn doorbell! I’m also pretty sure this is the last year where Buggy will be clueless to what is going on, so I soaked it up with him! Once he tastes candy, it will be downhill from there!
The whole checking out other people’s homes is not unique to toddlers. My 6yo could be found peaking in windows and checking out the contents of several of our neighbors homes. At one point she saw some boxes in the entry way and said, “So did y’all just move in?” I wanted to die.
PS They moved in in January.
What about the Parental Suggestion? Otherwise known as Adam muttering not-under-his-breath, “Tell her you want the Twix no not the Milky Way the Twix NONO THE ONE IN THE GOLD WRAPPER YES THAT ONE YEESSSS [fist pump].”
It’s possibly we all need to get out more.
(P.S. Mazzy looked beyond adorable.)
Yep, we had serious toddler meltdown time before we headed out yesterday. It’s a miracle they even had costumes on. One incident of trying to enter the stranger’s house, twp pieces stolen for myself, and three children screaming as I loaded them back in the van. Success.
Thank you for the entertainment! Mine is two and a half and DOES NOT know what candy is yet…I’m realizing that trend must go on as long as possible. 🙂
Mazzy is adorable.
You are hilarious! I love your blog and you have the cutest little girl! Mazzy is gorgeous! Please never stop writing! hugs from SA, TX
You’re looking at her new-found love of candy all wrong. Since you are tall enough to hide it in places she can’t look, you have the power. Candy’s a great tool for bribery and manipulation.
Make that three!
I love Mazzy, she is the cutest and your not to bad yourself!!! 😉 Happy Halloween!
I purchased the most adorable cupcake costume for my daughter last year, when she was 2 1/2. Naturally, when it came time to costume up, she declared that she was a ballerina, not a cupcake. She went trick-or-treating in her ratty old tutu while the gorgeous cupcake costume waited at home. *sigh*
My kiddo doesn’t say want anymore, he says neeeeed! “I neeeeed it” at almost 3.
haha, this is great. i love #8 my son passed up so much good candy for dum dums. when he had his pick of FULL SIZE candy bars and picked a stupid hershey’s milk chocolate bar, i made him go back and trade for a snickers:
http://www.thekriegers.org/2013/11/halloween/
Rules of trick-or-treating with kids
1. When your older child rings the doorbell, be prepared for your youngest to sing “Ding Dong” “Ding Dong” “Ding Dong” until you get to the next house.
2. Once they figure out that Halloween=Candy, they will beg you every day until the next year to go trick or treating
3. Bite your lip when your neighbour gives your youngest a Rice Krispie Square, and gives your older one a box of rasins.
4. Toddlers don’t grasp that you must wait until you get home to eat the candy, and start eating it while walking. Then they take their saliva coated hand and stick in the candy bowl.
6. If you make your belly look like a basketball because your pregnant belly is big, be prepared for a kid to ask “Are you pregnant or are you fat?”
7. When you dress your two year old like the famous Mazzy Wiles, but then discover it after Halloween and people ask “Did you copy Ilana’s costume idea?” (I certainly did not)