The photo above was submitted to me by Kerry of HousTalkN. It's a photo of her friend Angie, celebrating her birthday with her two sons Dean (the one crying in the corner) and Johnny (the evil one closer to the cupcake).
Kerry said she's been trying and failing to come up with a caption to do the photo justice. I volunteered my services because clearly this photo deserves our collective attention.
It's a tough one because there is so much to work with here. Devastated Dean with four pints of ice cream and a box full of cupcakes just out of reach. Evil Johnny clearly hoping Mom's birthday wish is for Dean to disappear. And, of course, Angie, who is either blissfully ignorant to the whole thing or secretly plotting her escape.
I put some thought bubbles over their heads to help you guys out, but you do not have to follow them. For instance, perhaps it's funnier to imagine what Mom is wishing for her birthday amongst the chaos…
YOUR CALL. Just please indicate who is saying/thinking what in your caption.
Winner gets an AppCrayon from Dano ($9.99). That's right— AN ACTUAL PRIZE.
The AppCrayon is the smart little device that taught Mazzy how to hold a pen correctly. After using it TWICE. It's got a triangular shape with a "training grip" that helps kids figure out where to put their fingers. Plus, it comes with a free app that teaches proper letter writing techniques.
Check out Mazzy perfectly tracing a "D" above. As in, "D" for "devastated or "deprived" or… "Dean".
Winner will be announced on Friday.
Good luck!
This makes me snort laugh! I think Angie’s thought bubble should be, “I wish, I wish for more wine tonight.”
So cute!
Evil Johnny is saying: “I am wishing for more wishes…I am a genius! Ha ha ha!”
Dean is saying: “Where is the mint chocolate chip!”
Mom is saying: “This cupcake better have rum filling.”
Evil Johnny: Lean forward just a bit more and your hair will catch fire, then i get the cupcake and ice cream to myself!
Dean: Its not fair! How come he gets to help blow out the candle?
Mom: Do they make wine-cakes? I could really use one, or five, right now. . .
Mom is thinking “if I give them each 2 cupcakes, maybe they will be quiet long enough for me to enjoy some ice cream”
Dean is saying “like this, Johnny?!?”
Johnny is saying, “a little louder Dean, we almost have her to 2 cupcakes and a pint of ice cream!”
Evil Johnny: I will eat all that ice cream with my mind.
Devastated Dean: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Mom: As long as nobody touches my oxy…
Dean: “I wanted butter pecan!!!!”
Mom: “Just one cupcake..well, maybe two..”
Johnny: “I’m blowing it when she’s not looking muahaha”
Dean: “wtf!!!! why are you locking me in this chair?! You KNOW I can’t reach the ice cream and cupcakes and you ALSO know I don’t know how to work an ice cream scooper OR knife!!! Meanest Mom EVER!”
Evil Johnny: “Perrrfeeeccct, a little bit closer and I can grab the candle and light napkins on fire!!”
Dean: Mommy that MF scares me
Mom: They are a figment of my imagination
Johnny: I am the true Pyro of X-Men muah ha ha
Johnnny says with Evil laugh ” I finally got my hands on a cupcake.”
Mom: ” This cupcake is going to be delicious.”
Dean: ” I want a cupcake.”
My 9 year old son thought of these for the thought bubbles.
Baby on the left is screaming, “Marcia Marcia Marcia”
Baby on the right is thinking, “There can only be one.”
Mom is thinking, “When is daddy getting home?”
Evil Johnny: “Finally! Proof I am the favorite child! Mwahahaha!”
Mom: “Hurry up and blow this freakin’ candle out! I need a glass of wine and you both need a nap!”
Dean: “It’s not fair!! He gets a cupcake and I get a bottle?! YOU DON’T LOVE ME!”
Dean: What no Elmo? I wanted an Elmo cake! Mom never listens to me!
Mom: Maybe if I just ignore him he will stop.
Johnny: Look she is still totally ignoring you. Told you I’m the favorite.
Evil Johnny (thinking): I hope that cupcake explodes so I can get some all over my face and in my mouth…
Dean: Ice Cream?!?! Cupcakes?!?! I’m lactose intolerant…WHY?!?!?!? WWaaaaahhhhh!
Dean: “Look at that chocolate and sugar, and all I’ve got is fruit on my tray!
Mom: “I wish I was a bird so I can fly far, far away”
Johnny: “I bet I blow it out first! Hee,Hee,Hee”
Johnny: ‘yeah, you better cry Dean! Mommy is wishing for a baby sister and you’ll no longer be the baby! Hahaha”
Dean: “Graeters?! Geesh does Mom ever listen?? She knows Blue Bell is the ONLY Ice Cream I like!”
Mom: ” I wish for a baby sitter… (not a baby sister!) :-)opp
Dean: I WANT CUPCAKES NOW!!!!!!!!
Mom (thinking): Keep crying kid and I’ll give all the cupcakes to your brother.
Johnny (thinking): It’s working….
Wait! This is better…
Dean: MOM! JOHNNY IS LOOKING AT ME FUNNY!!!!
Mom: Keep crying kid and I’ll give all the cupcakes to your brother.
Johnny: It’s working….
That picture is amazeballs! 🙂
You will need to insert the appropriate tone of voice for each of the following captions.
Evil Johnny: I just pooped!
Dean: I just pooped.
Mom: Well shit.
Johnny: She’s wishing you would turn into a puppy.
Dean: PUPPIES CAN’T HAVE ICE CREAM!
Mom: I wish…for earplugs.
Mom (thinking): All I need is my phone and a little ‘bathroom’ time…
Johnny: Ha-HA! I AM NOW TALL ENOUGH TO REACH THE DOOR HANDLE! That cupcake is MINE!
Dean: I can’t even get out of this f*cking chair by myself!!!!!!
I think evil Johnny is thinking “Dean, if you don’t stop crying I’m going to make this flame burst and then mommy’s birthday will really be ruined!”
Johnny: The second she looks away, that cupcake is mine! Dean: What the heck?! You tell me I can’t have dairy, and then you do this?! I’m moving to the rainforest! At least then I get my own pet jaguar! Kerry: Please, just one full night’s sleep… maybe on a tropical island… maybe I’ll even let their dad come….Nah. I’m moving there!
Johnny: The power of fire is now mine! Bow before me, mortals!
Dean: Mom! What have you done?!
Kerry: I can’t believe it’s my sweet boy’s birthday!
Dean: I said NO SPRINKLES! AWWWW!
Angie: These earplugs are the mommy gift EVER.
Johnny: Ahhh, fire– the key to my world domination plan!
Dean: Aw, dee, no cake for you, it has egg bites. No ice dream ee-der, dat has egg bites and ilk.
Johnny: Mooo-oom, egg ides, ilk, noooooo!
Angie: Calgon, take me away!
Dean is screaming: “No Mom! You know the pixies tell Johnny to burn things!”
Caption over Evil Johnny’s head: Future arsonists just love birthdays.
Johnny: I wish that I get to open the BIG present first.
Kerry: Little dies he know, the BIG present is a giant bottle of wine for ME
Dean: Um….I made a “big present.”
I made a mock-up for this one and posted it on Twitter.
https://twitter.com/RelUnrelated/status/372685764921786370/photo/1/large
Dean: “Lactose intolerant? Noooooo!”
Johnny: “Next week I tell him he’s adopted!”
Johnny: “If I wish real hard he should turn into a puppy!”
Mom: “Here let me help you with that wish!”
Dean – “I don’t have any teeth to eat the cupcakes.”
Johnny – “I wish for world domination.”
Kerry – “I wish for a wine fountain that has an endless wine supply.”
(general photo caption)
As Johnny leaned in to his buttercream cupcake, Dean was suddenly struck by the vast unfairness of a milk protein allergy.
Dean: ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME??? seriously? A BOTTLE?? I suppose my baby book is just teeming with cute phrases I’ve said and all my awesome milestones.
Mom: I’ve lost the will to live.
Johnny: MWAHAHAHAHA! Project ‘squeeze out the intruder child’ is going much better than I’d planned. MWAHAHA!
Dean: Nooo. All birthdays are supposed to be my birthday.
Johnny: Working on mommy’s present now, she’s going to love this poop in my pull ups.
Mom: Almost time for me to have a long bout of constipation in the bathroom, heehee. They believe that everytime.
Dean: Why do I have to be so f-ing short?! I can’t reach a damn thing!!!
Johnny: Hey Dean….SUCK IIIITTTT!!!!!
Mom: It’s not my birthday but I wish for this cupcake to turn into a bottle of vodka.
Oops I misread, it IS her birthday….take two:
Dean: Why do I have to be so f-ing short?! I can’t reach a damn thing!!!
Johnny: Hey Dean….SUCK IIIITTTT!!!!!
Mom: I wish for this cupcake to turn into a big ass bottle of vodka
Johnny to Dean- “Ha, Ha, Ha, you’re allergic to gluten.” Dean through fits of screaming tears, “I th th th thought I was just lactose intolerant….MOOOOM, what’s for meeeee????”
Just a gal who has trouble with her intestines trying to throw a little humor at the situation. 🙂
Devastated Dean is sayine “Where are my Moosetracks? I asked for Moosetracks!”
Evil Johnny is thinking “Lighten up man, she’s about to blow out the exploding candle.”
johnny: finally… it’s here… my first wish. dean is about to become Jean. ha ha ha
Dean: noooo
Dean: I can’t reach!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Evil Johnny: I would love to stick my snot covered fingers in there right now.
Mom: Where did my life go?
Evil Johnny: Ha, ha, I just pooped. Mom’s gonna have to change me, and then forget about her cupcake. I’ll take it when she changes me and hide it in my crib.
Dean: I’m lactose intorlant! IT’S SO UNFAIR!
Mom: Oh shoot, I think I’m pregnant with #3!
This post is old I know but I’m in the mist of sleeping training and had no idea how hard naps would be. Your post has been very eye opening. I could not find a follow up post on how you worked out naps. How long did it take your youngest to start napping regularly from the beginning of sleep training. Any and all info would be appreciated. Thank you, sincerely a desperate mom 🙂 magen.culver@yahoo.com