Let me start by saying I love this photo. I love seeing a picture of a mother breastfeeding in a totally different set of circumstances than my own. I love that she posted it on instagram as no big deal. And I am totally jealous of her hair and make-up team.
That being said, this photo paints a very different picture than what I imagine breastfeeding looked like when I nursed my two little girls at home. I'm sure it was beautiful. Just not quite as easy breezy.
Here are the top ten differences between what Gisele looks like breastfeeding her kid compared to what I looked like when I breastfed mine…
1. While Gisele's bathrobe looks virgin white, mine looks like I used it to wipe clean the bottom of my make-up drawer and then it got burned in a fire.
2. While Gisele looks completely topless under there, all my instagram followers would get a big eyeful of my stretched out overused nursing bra.
3. Not only would my baby have yanked that chain straight off my neck, the necklace would sit in a bowl by my front door, waiting for me to take it to the jeweler to get fixed for the next three to five years.
4. My hair stylist usually doesn't start working on my hair until after I'm done feeding the kids. And by "hair stylist" I mean me and my trusty ponytail holder.
5. Speaking of hair, why is there so much on her head? Shouldn't half of it be in the drain?
6. If I had my nails done while breastfeeding, they would be immediately destroyed the second I used my hands to prop up the baby, resash my robe, reattach my nursing bra or who the hell knows. I just know a minute later, I'd be thinking "DAMNIT!!!! WHY DO I EVEN BOTHER???"
7. If I had one person curling my hair, one person outlining my eyes, one person painting my nails, all while a baby gnawed on my left breast, my expression would look closer to "Oh no. What if I have to pee…?" rather than the look of ecstasy you see here.
8. Where's Gisele's phone? How can you nurse a baby while simultanelously reading blogs about how tough nursing a baby is when you are not holding your phone?
9. Pretty sure Gisele's just taken a shower while I would be praying I have enough time to wipe my armpits with a wash cloth before heading off to work.
10. After breastfeeding, Gisele will have her make-up, hair, and nails complete. I'll look the same as when I started. Unless my baby choses that moment to upchuck her lunch in my hair. Then I'll look even worse.
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Love this, especially #8. If nothing else, Giselle got the media to talk about breastfeeding and that’s a start!
Hahahaha Seriously, how is it that they look glamorous doing regular stuff!
Yes, #8!! So true.
#5 made me laugh out loud, but all so true. Frankly, I’m impressed the hair and makeup team are not distracted by the possibility of seeing Gisele’s boob-age.
My “hair & makeup team” generally consists of a bottle of dry shampoo, my fingers (finger comb) & a pony tail holder (maybe a cameo appearance by a bobby pin or two). Plus, my son likes to see what he’s eating, so my boobs are usually on full display for the world to see.
SERIOUSLY LOVE THIS! And if by some off chance I could con a team of stylists to tend to me while breastfeeding, I would surely have my hair yanked out, a makeup pencil or brush shoved in my eye, and my fingertips clipped off because my 8 month old now likes to dance on my belly while she eats, causing me to constantly move around to keep her from falling off.
Yes. Every little bit of this. I laughed out loud more than once. My guy is 5 months, so I’m right in the thick of it and totally needed to read this!
I loved this! I’m breastfeeding an eight month old right now so I’m living all your comments. I’m glad Gisele posted this photo though. Anything to get more women to breastfeed their babies is a good thing to me even if she does set the glamour bar unattainably high.
Ha! Ha ha ha ha. I’m with you, Ilana. My breastfeeding experience has not resembled Giselle’s pic either… not in the slightest. lol. But hey, good for her, and it is a beautiful picture.
Don’t forget the fact that the baby is in all white. I don’t think anyone dresses their baby in all white in real life.
I absolutely love this picture. And I was wondering the same thing about why half of her hair isn’t in the drain!
Can I please add a #11?
#11 My baby would not be lying there blissfully on my lap while breastfeeding. No, she likes to do acrobatics while clamping tight to my nipple. Twisting one way and then the other to see what was going on around us and THEN trying to nurse upside down for giggles.
#5 is so perfect! Why hasn’t hers come out in clump after clump until she wonders how there is anything more than 10 strands left on her head?!
Love that Gisele is proud of breastfeeding, even if it really is less-than-glamourous for us normal humans. That said, many women make it sound too easy already.
ha ha yes to all of those !!
this morning I was nursing while eating breakfast. my hair stylist was a little 5 month old. he grabbed a section of hair and pulled…
breastfeeding I guess, not nursing. does anyone say nursing anymore? I swear I’m not that old.
I absolutely relish in reading your blogs every day because it makes me feel more normal not to be the perfect mother, or woman. You take an every day situation- good or bad- and relay it to the world in a self-deprecating manner that we can all relate to and always, whatever the topic, I find myself smiling or laughing out loud when done with your articles. The mental images are enough to have me giggling all day. You’re. Simply. The. Best.
There are only a few pictures of me nursing, but the ones that exist make me happy. Even though I look decidedly NOT like that.
She’s not even taking her own instagram photo!
#10 right there with you!
I love this post and I don’t get all of the hate going around today about this photo. Of course it’s a ridiculous scenario that no one other than Gisele will ever experience, but it’s a beautiful moment and a great reminder to the public that breast feeding isn’t something women should be ashamed of. I give her a big thumbs up, even if I hate her a little bit.
I have, when my baby was constipated. Worked like a very dirty charm.
my photo would also look different because rather than just curling my hair, the hairdresser would be trying to figure out what the F to do with the new postpartum pseudo-bangs that are growing back in around my face. Straight up in the air. In the color grey. In the texture of wire.
With all due respect (because I don’t care which way you swing), there’s no looking at boobage from the hair and make up guys because they like other guys?
I know for sure I never looked like that when breastfeeding. There were usually a clutter of other littlies all wanting vegemite sandwiches or wanting to go potty at that time too. No virginal whites in my home! 🙂
looooove this!!! you’re hilarious in how right you are!!! love the necklace in a dish for 3-5 years!!! can’t wait to dig deeper into your blog! lol!! thank you!
It must be so easy to breastfeed when you’ve got helpers – someone would undoubtedly take the baby and burp and change it for her after she breastfed so she wouldn’t ruin her new nail polish. Yep, if I’d had so many helpers on hand when I had a newborn that breastfeeding gig would have been a whole lot easier! Lucky her!!