Last week, I introduced an ad campaign I created for healthy mama, a new line of over-the-counter remedies designed specifically for pregnant women. The products use the safest* ingredients to tackle common pregnancy symptoms like heartburn, lack of sleep, pain relief, nausea and constipation— but with fun names like "Tame the Flame", "Move it Along" and "Shake that Ache". You can learn more about them here.
I came up with three ads that will be running in magazines starting in April and asked you all to come up with the fourth ad in the campaign, with healthy mama giving the winner a $750 cash prize.
Little did I know, in just one week, we'd have enough new headlines to continue the campaign for the next five to fifty years. I had to read over 2000 of them and the contest is not even over yet!
Not only that— your headlines are WAY FUNNIER than the ones I wrote originally. (Shhhh! Don't tell the client!)
Below are 30 of my favorite healthy mama headlines so far:
The above headlines are not the finalists. Just some of my favorites at this point in the contest. I did not attribute them to anyone yet because there are a lot of duplicate entries. If a duplicate headline wins, the win will go to the person who left the comment first. In some cases, people had similar ideas but wrote them differently. In that case, the win would go to the person who said it better. Preference will also be given to comments written under the blog post as opposed to comments written on facebook.
If you'd like to try out healthy mama's line of remedies, I highly recommend the "Make Mama Happy Survival Kit". It contains "Shake that Ache", "Tame the Flame", "Move it Along" and "EaZZZZe the Pain".
You can purchase the kit at Buy Buy Baby or on healthymamabrand.com. It makes a great baby shower gift and will totally set you apart from the sea of tiny onesies and handknit booties everyone else will bring.
Healthy mama is also being sold at babiesrus.com, Buy Buy Baby and coming soon to Drugstore.com.
Thank you to eveyone who entered so far. I am blown away by the response. The contest is open until April 1st and you can enter here. Just make sure you "like" healthy mama on facebook first.
I know I said we'd announce the winner on the 2nd, but I think we might need a few more days after the submission period is over to sort through all the entries and make sure we select the right winner.
Thanks for your patience and have a great weekend!
– Mommy Shorts
PS: If you have a favorite headlines from the ones above, please let me know in the comments. And follow Mommy Shorts on facebook or subscribe to get daily updates if you want to know when I do another one of these!
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This post was sponsored by healthy mama, but all of the thoughts and opinions are my own.
* No medication is considered 100% safe during pregnancy and nursing.
You may have a typo in here. But in light of the contest…….
We can’t stop people from asking when you’re going to have a baby (starting as early as a bridal shower) but we can help you deal with almost everything else.
Haha I *think* you meant baby shower, not bridal 🙂
Thank you! It’s fixed!
No, she meant bridal. As in people start wondering when you’re going to pop out kids as soon as you’re engaged.
Yeah I think Breenah is right. 🙂
HA! I love the one that says “We can’t have sex with your husband for you….”! Winner in my book! LOL
I so meant to submit one earlier.
We can’t hold your hair back when you are getting sick
Hahaha! Love the “We can’t get your in-laws out of the delivery room”!!!
Hands down winner!! Wish I would’ve written it!
We can’t stop people from asking “when are you due?” 6 weeks after you gave birth, but we can…
It should be bridal. By the baby shower, they are pretty sure you are having a kid. 🙂
I love the one about passing gas in your prenatal yoga class. 🙂
Lol. Pee or broke your water
It’s funny because it’s true!
We can’t stop strangers from thinking it’s OK to touch your pregnant belly…
These are TOO funny!
Freaking hilarious!!!
The honking your horn with your belly made me spit my tea out! That happened to a friend and we nearly crashed from laughing so hard!
Here’s my contribution –
We can’t keep your boobs from touching your stomach, but we can help you deal with almost everything else.
But yeah, sex with your husband gets my vote!
I literally just kept laughing harder and louder as I kept reading these. They are hilarious! I love the “We can’t sex with your husband” and “We can’t open an In-n-Out Burger in Michigan.”
I was around 30 weeks pregnant and REALLY craving In-n-Out Burger, so I looked up the closest one (in Arizona, would take me 2-3 days to get there), filled up my gas tank, and thankfully my boyfriend convinced me not to go. I eventually moved onto craving a rainbow and cried for a week because I could never eat a rainbow.
The egg that hatches into a kitten one made me laugh. I like that one best.
The one I could most relate to is the one about the best friend stealing your baby name. 🙁
This rainbow comment made me laugh harder then the actual post lol
I love the in-laws one. I laid down the law waaay before the delivery room though 🙂
We can’t make you look like a pregnant Victoria’s Secret model, but we can help you with everything else.
Here’s my spin on it
We “can’t” tell you to duct tape your father-in-law’s mouth shut for the next few months…but we can help you deal with almost everything else.
Grooming lady parts and sex with your husband!!!! Those are the absolute best for sure!!!!!!!
These are so great. God I don’t miss being pregnant…
Whenever I crave a rainbow I find a jumbo bag of Skittles does the trick.
We can’t stop people in the grocery store from wondering if you’re already pregnant again while you’re holding your newborn, but can help you deal with almost everything else.
We can’t stop people from peeking over your nursing cover to get a glimpse of the baby only to jerk away in horror but we can help you deal with almost everything else.
Real nose. Hands down.
We can’t stop relatives from asking if it was planned, but we can help with almost everything else.
We can’t stop the Varicose Veins from forming in “insane places”…
We can’t stop your DDD boobs from becoming EFG boobs
We cant stop you from peeing a little every time you laugh, cough, or sneeze but we can ……
I would have bought ALL of the products and enjoyed every single one of these ads!
Yup, I liked that one too! Happened way to often!
We can’t help you roll over without getting stuck like an upside-down turtle, but…
in laws in the delivery room is my front runner – i can’t think of anything worse!
The only one that made me actually laugh out loud was the honking with your belly one. Love it!
We can’t bring “The Sexy Back” to the pregnancy waddle, but we can help you deal with almost everything else.
We can’t keep your pregnancy jeans from sagging, but we can help you deal with almost everything else.
ha ha, those are all so funny. thanks for posting them!
These are great!! Thanks for the laughs 🙂
We can’t stop you pooping into a nurse’s hand…
We can’t help you avoid having to go through potty training AGAIN…
We can’t make minivans cool…
Is that not the most hilarious thing eva?
ha ha, my mother in law did that one time at a child’s birthday party. to cut her a little slack though, I think I was nursing my 3 week old through the ENTIRE party. one of my friends asked me “you’re STILL breastfeeding?”
I said, no, breastfeeding AGAIN.
I think that is my favorite. I thought I was the only one that had that problem.
We can’t stop people from asking if you’re too old to have a baby
We can’t stop the random stranger who says you’re having a boy because your auras are all shades of blue
“We can’t nurse your baby while your cracked nipples heal”…
know what I’m sayin?!
We can’t stop people from boxing you in with their cars in the parking lot so you have climb out the hatch while 9 months along. AND we can’t stop people from ramming your huge belly with their shopping carts at Costco. Ah, the memories.
Oh and also we can’t stop your bra size from reaching letters of the alphabet that shouldn’t be bra sizes!
Holy hilarious! This was the best way to start my day!
I don’t know how I missed your first article!! What a fantastic opportunity for you!
Although I have no chance in winning… “We can’t help you wipe that look of shock off a stranger’s face when you tell them you are only six-months along, but we can…”!
We can’t explain why pickles really do taste good with ice cream.
We can’t help you fit in the chair when you go to teacher’s conferences for the older kid.
We can’t help you get out of the low, low beach chair.
btw LOVE the In n Out one!!!
You had a typo. In & out burger in Michigan is actually “In n Out Burger”
My fave is the egg hatching into kitten. Lmao
We can’t pay the speeding ticket you got on the way to get ice cream at 12 a.m. but we can help you deal with almost everything else.
We can’t pay the speeding ticket you got on the way to get ice cream at 12 a.m. but we can help you deal with almost everything else.
We can’t make the baby stop hiccuping while you’re trying to sleep but we can help you deal with almost everything else.
We can’t help you roll out of bed faster when you have to pee a million times during the night but we can help you deal with almost everything else.
we can’t stop you pooping during the birth…..
We can’t keep you from pushing for 3 hours but we can help you with just about everything else.
We can’t hold your hair back for you, but we can help you deal with almost everything else.
We can’t make getting caught sleeping under your desk at work any less awkward
The curry seafood one is the best! Oh the pregnancy nose.
We can’t increase the size of your bladder…
We can’t stop your brother-in-law from leering at your newfound cleavage, but we can help you deal with almost everything else.
We can’t help people from asking when you’ll have another baby as you recover in the hospital, but we can help you deal with almost everything else.
We can’t stop you from pulling into a drive thru for a “snack” on your way to lunch….
“We can’t pick up what you dropped on the floor…”
So many of these are hilarious!! My four week old and I got a belly laugh ;).
Or the opposite: We can’t have sex with you when your husband decides he’s done because it’s “too creepy” that the baby is “so big” and “right there in between us”
[…] #9. 30 Hilarious Headlines about Pregnancy […]
Showed this to a co-worker after I laughed so hard I snorted.
She laughed so hard she had to waddle to the restroom (her description, not mine).
Thanks for these!