I’m about to talk about smells. Not the good kind (we’ll get to that later). The kind that makes you break out the air freshener spray even though you hate the way the air freshener spray smells. You’re just hoping the metallic odor of the air freshener will disguise the even worse smell.
What does it say about air freshener that we spray it as far away from our bodies as possible and then hold our breath as we run out of the room like we have three seconds before the whole bathroom detonates?
Did I say bathroom? Yeah, that’s where the worst smells in our house happen (totally not my doing *ahem*), plus I wouldn’t dream of bringing the air freshener out of the bathroom where it could actually be sprayed near things we eat and sleep in.
I do not trust my air freshener. I do not want to inhale it. I do not want to eat it. I basically use it for EMERGENCY SMELL SITUATIONS. And smell emergencies only exist in my house when we have visitors. Otherwise, I’d rather wait out the natural stench than breathe in the chemical fumes of the supposed “freshener.”
This is why I am so excited Method just launched its new air refreshers. They come in lovely natural scents: french lavender, beach sage, wild poppy, sweet tangerine and fresh clover. The beach sage is my favorite, followed by the sweet tangerine. Mazzy likes the fresh clover. I asked her what she thought it smelled like and she said, “leaves”. EXACTLY.
Since it’s Method, I know all the products are non-toxic and eco-friendly. The new air refreshers are designed with revolutionary pressurized air technology, which means unlike most traditional aerosol sprays (which are powered by petroleum-based propellant mixed in with the product), they are powered by PURE AIR.
How that works exactly, I don’t know, but I don’t really know how my TV turns on either. All I know is that when you spray, you fill your room with one of Method’s vibrant all-natural scents. No CFCs (those are the things that destroy the ozone). No dirty propellants. No need to run out of the room screaming.
Today, Method and I are launching something really exciting. Remember when I created the Healthy Mama ad campaign earlier this year and then asked you all to write your own headlines for a chance to win $750? And you guys wrote way funnier lines than I did to begin with?
I’m doing the same for Method Air Refreshers. I created five mock ads (one for each of their fresh scents) talking about the things that stink in my house.
Here goes…
Now, I’d like to throw it to you guys to come up with even better, more specific, stinkier headlines (I’m assuming things smell bad in your house too), for the chance to win a grand prize $1,000 Target gift card and a year supply of Method Air Refreshers.
Plus, nine secondary winners will get a $50 gift card and the complete line of Method Air Refreshers.
Enticing enough for you?
To enter, just make sure you…
1) Follow both Method and Mommy Shorts on facebook
2) Share this post in some way (like/share on facebook, tweet on twitter, call your mom, etc.)
3) Leave a comment below. (You can enter multiple times, but please only leave one headline per comment.)
The structure should be as follows:
It’s like Mad Libs for horrible household smells! (Feel free to incorporate car and office stench too.) If more than one person enters the same stench, I will select the headline I think is worded the best. If they are worded the same, preference will go to the person who commented first.
You can find the full rules here.
I’ll post some of my favorites next week and then gear up to my ten finalists on September 4th. Then the winner will be selected by vote on September 17th.
If the headlines are funny enough (and I know you guys are funny)— there’s a slight possibility Method could actually use this in their Air Refresher campaign…
Fingers crossed and good luck!
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This post was sponsored by Method, but all thoughts, opinions and ad mock-ups are my own.
Instead of my bathroom smelling like a multi-cat litter box, i’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of my garbage bin smelling like something died in there, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Btw, does this open to Canadian readers?
Instead of my classroom smelling like 20 kids who don’t wear deodorant after gym class, I would rather it smell like fresh clover!
Instead of my daughters room smelling like potty training in progress, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of the diaper genie smelling like rotten egg, backed up sewage, and decomposing waste combined, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Btw, I really like method to come to canada….HINT HINT!
Instead of my boys’ bathroom smelling like a fraternity bathroom at a college for the blind, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of my garage smelling like a locker room after my husband’s hockey game, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Instead of my infants room smelling like poopy diapers, I’d like it to smell like fresh baked chocolate chip cookies.
Instead of my car smelling like the onion I lost off of last weeks cheeseburger, Id like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of my office smelling like the sewage treatment plant, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
I actually work at a sewage treatment plant so, help!!
Instead of my kitchen smelling like a sippy cup of chunky milk left in the sun for several days, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of my classroom smelling like middle school gym class, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of my mud room smelling like sweaty Fritos, I would like it to smell like wild poppy.
I’m a big fan of your site, but no longer a fan of Facebook. Can we follow you and Method on Instagram instead to qualify?
Instead of my living room smelling like a dog who only bathes himself with the mouth that eats poop, I would like it to smell like wild poppy.
I am also not on Facebook, hope I can still win.
Instead of the kitchen smelling like reheated fish tacos that my toddler insisted she wanted to have for dinner but then decided it was unacceptable since it wasn’t on her favorite plate, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of my laundry room smelling like my cats shitbox, I would like for it to smell like sweet tangerine.
instead of my kitchen smelling like rotten vegetables i forgot we had in our produce drawer, i’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of my bathroom smelling like last night’s BK gone bad, I’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of my living room smelling like the potty training toddler mixed with a puppy being house trained and an infant in diapers I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of my bathroom smelling like the lunchbox I forgot to wash over the weekend, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of the nursery smelling like the diaper genie escaped the bottle, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of my kitchen smelling like whatever my cat just barfed up all over the floor, I’d rather it smell like beach sage.
(True story, happened at 4AM. Extra hurtful because we have to get up at 5:30AM. Yay for mopping the kitchen at dawn. NOT.)
P.s. anyone want a free cat?
Instead of the family room smelling like the protein shake that fermented and exploded in my husband’s gym bag, I’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of my bathroom smelling like the sippy cup of milk left in the car, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Instead of my laundry room smelling like sweaty socks and soggy towels, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
instead of my son’s bedroom smelling like my dog’s butt from scooching it on the carpet, i’d like it to smell like french lavender.
Instead of my bedroom smelling like stinky,sweaty smell husband’s work clothes, I would rather it smell like french lavender
Instead of my bathroom smelling like the basement after it flooded up to my knees, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of my bathroom smelling like the load of laundry I forgot in the washer for four days, I’d like it to smell like french lavender.
Instead of my kids playroom smelling like the curdled *real* milk they put in the *toy* refrigerator, I’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of my laundry room spelling like wet lighting McQueen undies, I’d like it to smell like french lavendar.
Instead of my bathroom smelling like my son forgot to flush (again), I’d like it to smell like French lavender.
Before my house smelled like a dirty diaper pail used by 8 daycare kids, but now it smells like French Lavender.
Instead of my dorm room smelling like my roommate had a little too much fun at the party last night, I’d like it to smell like french lavender.
Instead of my sons bathroom smelling like he’s gone pee 12 times without flushing, I would rather it smell like French Lavender.
Instead of my car smelling like sour milk, I’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of my car smelling like spoiled milk from the sippy cup I can’t find, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
instead of my bathroom smelling like my five year old son pee’d on a puppy pad instead of in the toilet, i’d like it to smell like wild poppy. (true story)
Instead of my Jeep smelling like Raccoons broke in trying to get the pickles my toddler threw off his Happymeal, I’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of my couch smelling like 7 children’s backsides, I’d like it to smell like fresh clover!
Instead of my pantry smelling like an old lost potato I’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of the nursery smelling like my baby smeared poop on the walls, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of my car smelling like a long-lost sippy cup of spoiled milk, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of hallway smelling like dirt, raw sewage, and old gym socks because my husband left his Marine uniform and boots there I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Instead of my kitchen pantry smelling like the bag of rotten potatoes that got lost behind the canned goods three months ago, I’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of our kitchen smelling like we didn’t scrape off the leftover food on all of the dishes after Mexican night, I’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of the entry closet smelling like a grease monkey lives in there, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of my bedroom smelling like yesterday’s poor choices, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of my bathroom smelling like recycled kimchi, I would like it to smell like french lavender!
Instead of our garbage disposal smelling like a rat died in it after scavenging for food scraps, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Instead of my nursery smelling like three week old bottle that i didnt realize was under my son dresser I would rather it smelled like (clean baby like it is supposed or) fresh clovers.
Instead of my living room smelling like the cat poop on the couch in an unconditioned house after coming home from a vacation, I’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of my house smelling like a dirty diaper pail used by 8 daycare kids. I’d like it to smell like French Lavender.
Instead of my laundry room smelling like wet laundry from three days ago I’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of my 1 year old favorite cowboy boots smelling like teenage boy feet, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of my laundry room smelling like my husband’s 6-month old unwashed broom ball equipment, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of my bathroom smelling like “I forgot to flush”, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of my bathroom smelling like an outhouse in summer, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of my house smelling like 5 guys who do manual labor all day I’d like it to smell like beach sage
Instead of my living room smelling like old dog pee, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine!
Instead of the living room smelling like a dog who can’t control her gas, I’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of my only bathroom smelling like boy’s pee, I’d like it to smell like lavender.
Instead of my four-year old sons bathroom smelling like wild poop-y, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Instead of my laundry bin smelling like the morning after spring break hotel room, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Instead of the playroom smelling like a hidden sippy cup of old milk, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of my kitchen smelling like the microwave macaroni that my son put in the microwave without water, so it burned and melted in the microwave— I’d like it to smell like Method Sweet Tangerine.
Instead of my kitchen smelling like we went on vacation right before our power went out & everything in the fridge has gone bad id like it to smell like French lavender
Instead of my car smelling like 4 years worth of sour milk, I would like it to smell like French lavender.
Instead of the bottom of my trashcan smelling like Andy Dufresne after he escaped from Shawshank, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Instead of my kitchen smelling like spoiled wine and shame, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
Instead of my living room smelling like a missing sippy cup of spoiled milk, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy!
instead of my bathroom smelling like vomit after my husband drank too much and couldn’t make it to the toilet, i’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of my playroom smelling like my two year old’s antibiotic induced ,explosive poopy accident, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy!
Instead of the month old milk in the sippy cup my toddler tossed into the bottom of her toybox, I’d like our playroom to smell like French lavender
Instead of my living room smelling like the dead, rotting mouse that trapped itself beneath the vent, I’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of the baby’s room smelling like the poopy diaper that fell behind the changing table that my husband “forgot” to retrieve, I’d like it to smell like French lavender.
Instead of my bathroom smelling like three expert watergun marksmen who can’t aim into a toilet, I’d like it to smell like French lavender.
Instead of my office smelling like reheated fish, I’d like it to smell like wild poppy.
My husbands closet smells like a college dorm room with all his old college st. patty’s sweaters!!
Instead of my daughter’s room smelling like she forgot to clean the bunny cage for the 3rd week in a row, I’d rather it smell like French lavender.
Instead of my kitchen smelling like the ancient leftovers my husband decided to discard into the freshly emptied trash bin, I’d like it to smell like sweet tangerine.
Instead of my living room smelling like wet dog, I’d like it to smell like french lavender.
Instead of my car smelling like 3 kids with motion sickness, I’d like it to smell like lavender
Instead of the man cave bathroom smelling like we have automatic flushing, self-cleaning toilets (we don’t), I’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of my laundry room smelling like a landfill from the cloth diapers I forgot to was the other night, I’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of my kitchen smelling like the fruit pouch I left in my car for two weeks over summer break, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of my husbands closet smelling like a college dorm room with all his old college st. Patty’s sweaters, I’d like it to smell like a fresh clover!
Instead of whole house smelling like a 13 year old cat with a bowel disorder, I’d like it to smell like fresh clover.
Instead of my kitchen smelling like mildewing sponges (because I’m apparently the only one around here who knows how to rinse and wring out a sponge), I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
I got nothin’. It doesn’t get much better than the Den smelling like spilled breast milk ROFL!
I’ll try anyway:
Instead of my bathroom smelling like soiled cloth diapers, I’d prefer it to smell like French Lavender
Instead of my kitchen smelling like my Kimchee culinary failure, I would like it to smell like Sweet Tangerine.
Instead of my toddler’s room smelling like he ate nothing but chicken curry last night, I would like it to smell like French Lavender.
Instead of my house smelling like my infant in diapers ate nothing but cabbage I’d like it to smell like tangerine.
Instead of my nursery smelling like baby poop after baby starts eating real food, I’d like it to smell like fresh clover
Instead of my nursery smelling like the dog just took a swim in the neighbors compost pile during a rain shower, I’d like it to smell like beach sage.
Instead of the kid’s bathroom smelling like Taco Tuesday from the school cafeteria, I’d like it to smell like Method’s Fresh Lavender Air Freshener.
Instead of my car smelling like ny kids’ football cleats, I’d like it to smell like French lavender.
Instead of the laundry room smelling like weeks of WELL worn hockey equipment, I’d like it to smell like French lavender
Instead of my breezeway smelling like dog urine, I’d like to smell like Sweet Tangerine
Instead of my bathroom smelling like my eight year old’s inability to flush, I’d like it to smell like Fresh Clover.