It all started with a text from my sister last weekend. It read, “Thought of you and your average parent problems this morning when Neve started crying uncontrollably at 5am because she couldn’t see the back of her arm.”

I posted on my @averageparentproblems Instagram story and from there, the direct messages started rolling in. More and more ridiculous reasons why your kids are crying. And ohmygod, ALL OF THEM APPEARED TO BE CRYING. There were so many messages, I could not keep up with them. Five days later and I am still buried in crying kid messages and receiving more daily.

1) “My 4yo had a meltdown last night because he couldn’t go to his friends birthday party ‘now.’ He couldn’t understand that the party is in three weeks.” – Kayra

2) “I gave my baby two cookies. She only wanted one.” – Lela

3) “My 4yo had a dream during nap time in daycare that we were going to Target after school. When I picked her up and told her we were going home and not to Target… huge meltdown!” – Celina

4) “I put the spoon into the bowl of cereal and milk. And now it’s ‘wet’ and he needs a new spoon.” – Shana

5) “Because he couldn’t see his nose without a mirror. And when I told him I couldn’t see my nose either, it made things SO MUCH WORSE.” – Kate

6) “Every week day our local radio station plays trivia questions. It’s always a man vs a woman and if the man wins, my daughter cries for no less than 30 minutes.” – Emily

7) “My daughter cried in the car the other day because the sky was too far away.” – Ada

8) “Because we wouldn’t take him to Norway after we said, ‘what do you want to do today?” – Cara

9) “Because I wouldn’t let him eat a plastic bag.” – Tanya

10) “My 3yo was having a meltdown today because she didn’t want to go home. I had to remind her we were already there.” – Christie

11) “I accidentally flushed the toilet before my 3yo could say goodbye to his poop.” – Amber

12) “My kid is crying because his cup is ‘the worst.'” – Ashley

13) “Because I won’t let him use the ‘pink toothpaste.’ It’s hand lotion.” – Farrah

14) “My 4yo cried today because we drove by his friend’s house. We stopped when we saw her in the yard to say hi. He refused to say hi, so I drove away and he started to cry because he wanted to say hi.” – Amelia

15) “Because he lost his first tooth and the tooth fairy left him a toy and not a bowl of cereal. He put the toy back under his pillow and said, ‘She’ll do better next time.’ I have never seen such crying and heaving over getting a present.” – Gwen

16) “My kid is crying because he wants me to find the shoes that are already on his feet.” – Carly

17) “My kid is crying because I saw him first before he saw me. We were literally next to each other, face to face, in bed at 6am. I just happened to open my eyes and say hi first.” – Sheryl

18) “My kid is crying because she wanted to keep the Mother’s Day gift she made for me in school.” – Alia

19) “Because she doesn’t know how to find a job. She’s five.” – Cheria

20) “My kid is crying because he wants to go swimming but he doesn’t want to get wet.” – Tara

21) “My kid is crying because her sister is looking out of the car window on her side. Apparently we have to start talking about sharing car windows too.” – Alexandra

22) “My son cries because he is three. As in, last Saturday was his birthday and now any time someone asks how old he is and I say three, he starts screaming, ‘No, I’m not! I’M TWO!'” – Amanda

23) “My kid is crying because she wants a pedicure.” – Ashley

24) “My 7 month old cries because he stands up in his crib and then can’t figure out how to sit back down.” – Meg

25) “We are at Disney World. My son is crying because he wants to go back to the hotel and watch a show.” – Egur

26) “Because I won’t give him ‘this.’ The problem is, I have no idea what ‘this’ is.” – Lo

27) “Because her braids aren’t as long as Anna from Frozen.” – Adrilozano

28) “Because I won’t let her wipe MY bum after I go potty.” – Mrsbigtime

29) My daughter Saoirse had a meltdown because there is an E at the end of her name. I keep spelling her name and in tears, she cries back at me— ‘No E.'” – Cazalanna

30) “My 4yo is hysterical because I put her toothpaste on her toothbrush…’you tricked me’ were her exact words.” – Pen

31) “My son was crying two nights in a row because his train is looking at him while he is sleeping.” – Amanda

32) My 2yo had a breakfast meltdown because she didn’t want eggs. At no point was she offered eggs, were there eggs present or were eggs mentioned.” – Jen

33) My kids is crying because I let her watch YouTube Kids on my phone and people keep texting me and ‘interrupting’ her. God forbid people try to contact me on MY phone.” – Tiggaliv

34) “My 3yo is crying because he wanted to paint a really big orange fish, but insisted on using purple paint. Guess what color his fish is? NOT ORANGE.” – Kenzie

35) “My son cried so long this morning because he missed seeing 7:00am on the clock. He woke up at 7:03am and said it was never going back again to 7:00am.” – Imaez

36) My daughter is crying because she might forget to put her socks on correctly TOMORROW.” – mummybuddypants

37) “Because he’s learned enough in kindergarten and doesn’t want to continue going to school. ‘I’m smart already,’ he screams.” – Barret

38) “My kid is crying because we don’t live on a hill.” – Donna

39) “My daughter is having a meltdown because I told her she can’t marry her dad since he is married to me.” – laysmf

40) “My 2yo was crying on the kitchen floor because I pulled my hair back into a ponytail. He stopped crying as soon as I took it out.” – Jale

41) “My 3yo was crying because I wouldn’t turn left on the way to daycare. Turning left would have sent me in the wrong direction on a busy interstate.” – Ironlungprime

42) “My daughter is crying because she gave out birthday party invitations to her classmates and ended up without an invitation for herself.” – Sasha

43) “Because I won’t let her have the pretty, mint green Imodium as a snack.” – Sarah

44) “My 2yo had a total meltdown because I don’t know the words to a song he learned in daycare.” – Rachel

45) “My 2yo daughter always has her hair in her face, so when she moves it away, I always say, ‘Hi, face.’ My 3yo son heard me one day and started crying because, ‘I don’t have a face!'” – Doonz

46) “Because he wanted to hold onto a chocolate chip from his cookie and save it for later, but it ended up melting in his hand. I tried calling him a magician to lighten the mood, but it made it worse.” – Jay

47) My kid is crying because she doesn’t want the wind hitting her in the face while we are in the car but she doesn’t want me to roll the window up either.” – Anyikone

48) “My 4yo is crying because his 2yo sister is growling at him. HE JUST TAUGHT HER HOW TO GROWL.” – Veridia

49) “I was telling her what zodiac sign she was and she got mad because we weren’t the same sign. Then she got even more upset when she found out her brother and her dad were the same sign.” – Anna

50) “My daughter is crying because I “looked at her funny.’ TWO DAYS AGO. Wait for it…She is 13.”

Okay, there is still about a billion more direct messages to go through but I’m taking a break. Too many broken granola bars and wrong color sippy cups to count. Your turn.